The Truth Hurts, But Lie's Worse

I was afraid to let you know the truth. In a way, I was sort of protecting your feelings. But I didn't know that it was going to turn out like this. I know, it was wrong for us to do so. It was, okay. I never wanted to be someone who always talks about a person behind their back.

But to my, and our defence, we have put up with a lot from you. I had a right to be sorta angry. And well after what we've done, I know you did too.

But I couldn't take it anymore. We couldn't take it anymore. And if we had known that you wouldn't mind knowing the truth, we'd tell you of course. It wouldn't have turned out this way. But remember when we told you the truth? We realized that it hurt your feelings. So we stayed away from the truth. And it just blew up in the end, because we realized that you didn't care, so we stopped caring too. And don't ever say that this wouldn't happen if you were perfect. NOBODY IS PERFECT. And we never expected you to be one.

It sucks that this happened between us. But I know that what we did was stupid, selfish and inconsiderate. You said that you've realized your mistakes, and I thought to myself, that's all I wanted to hear. I just wanted to know that you're aware. Aware of the truth. Yeah well it could've gone better, but I guess that Allah has put us to the test. The test of friendship. You know what, in all honesty, I cared a lot. We cared a lot. Well I don't know how you treat your friends but I guess we were all trapped in a whirlwind of miscommunication. I guess we should have been more patient. But the truth of the matter was, we had been too patient. Maybe this was all going too fast. Maybe we didn't know each other that well. You didn't wanna open up to us. We didn't know. If only you'd let us know.

All in all, I am genuinely sorry.

And yes, I understand if you hate me right now. Do you know why I'm being tolerant? Because that's what friends do. You may not regard me as much of a friend right now, but I'll tell you this : I won't stop being a friend to you and I was lying when I said that I stopped caring. I never did, and you have to know that.

You have no idea how many times I've edited this. I want you to understand. Sigh. I wanna cry now because I feel awful, but making me feel so much worse than I already was isn't helping, okay. I don't want to be a bad person.

xoxo,
Zafirah.