Bombshell

"If you're in love, then you're the lucky one. Because most of us are bitter over someone."

"If you feel like taking it out of your chest, then by all means, do it."

And I did. And it was crazy. And I felt so scared the whole time. And then it was all over. Just like that. And then...we were back to normal.

I knew that I was bound to tell you about it, but I didn't know that it would've been so soon. I thought that I could hold it in until I have the strength to get over you, but the truth of the matter was that I wasn't strong enough. My feelings were overpowering my head and so I decided to follow my instinct. I just knew it in my heart that you would be totally cool with it.

Even though this happened a while ago, I'm not even sure whether you're genuinely okay with it, or you're just still in shock and want to be polite. I'm still reacting awkwardly with the situation too and the sad fact is I don't think we'll ever be the same again.

I promised you. I promised you that I'll get over it. Any normal person would doubt this. I mean, you can't play around with your feelings, because if that's how you really feel, then you can't deny it. But I have to try to get over it. For my own sake, and yours even. It's not even your fault. It's my own stupid feelings that made me do what my heart wanted to. If I didn't go with my instincts, I wouldn't have the guts to tell you the truth at all.

I'm sorry if it's awkward now. It hurts because I can't fight my own feelings. I never wanted you for myself of course, and I wish I can wipe this feeling of longing away. I wish you the best in life and I would love it if we are to become friends until the end.

I'll find 'the one' someday, I know it :)

xx