Self-Belief

watching a tv show is just for pure fun and nothing else. entertainment, we all need it sometimes. okay, most of the time, but that's not the point. the point is, Glee has definitely made me think of who i am as a person. we all have insecurities in life. and whether we like it or not, we can't deny that we care of what other people think of us. see, the cruelty of life is that everyone's a judge in this world. people judge the way you look, the way you dress, your personality and your popularity. that's just some of the things. people will also notice our flaws that we don't even think twice about. i've never been ashamed of who i am until now. okay, of course i was insecure of myself before because i want people to like me. but i've never felt ashamed. and now i am. i've always thought that i'm a victim when it comes to the way people see me. their judgements, are crucial to how i want to appeal to the society and everyone around me. and then when i think that i don't have an interesting personality, i started making up my own version of "the new me". i was making jokes that i spent hours trying to make them sound funny. i was obnoxious and vastly annoying. i was pretending to like certain music artists so that i have a topic to discuss with people. and i was making fun of others when i myself is not better than any of them. when i look back at those times, i thought that "the new me" is not me at all. i don't feel comfortable with my own skin, so how am i supposed to cope with a life that appreciates the motto "be yourself"?? because i wasn't being me. i was a fake person who thinks she's cool but she's actually a full-fledged loser at the lowest part of the world. so now i am me, the boring, bookworm girl with a love for oldies and musicals. it's who i am, but it's definitely better than someone who keeps telling the geeks that they are scuds. but even though i feel good, i realized that the world hasn't really accept me for who i am. look at Adam Lambert. his sexuality got the best of him. and so, before we even think about dissing someone's trench coat, look at ourselves in the mirror. "are we THAT cool??"