if i ask that question months before, i would've said yes, without hesitation. without thinking that much. to me, you're smart, pretty, funny and nice. and i could use you for my own benefit. i could be a better person, a better student. that's what i thought at first.
but then, things changed.
things will change of course. but this is not the change i hoped for. things changed, and so did you. but from my perspective, i wouldn't call it as change. i would probably call it, the honest truth. i saw the truth of what you are and what you aren't. i finally found out that you aren't the person i thought you are, instead you are the type of person that i would never talk to in a million years. the type of person who is a hypocrite, selfish and judgemental. and when my heart twisted and crashed into pieces, i asked myself "how could a girl like me who can have eyes that can see, cannot see this coming??". i looked back at those times. those happy times, but are merely kept in the deepest part of my mind so i couldn't look at them again. i looked back, and then i saw it. my eyes could really, really see now. i was happy, indeed i was. but i was only happy if you were happy. it was as if i could not be happy for myself or by myself. i had to make you happy to make myself feel good. it was...complicated. what happened to the simple rule of friendship? how can i be happy with you if it's complicated? i decided that you and i apart is the best way for me and for you too. bcos i can't live if i have a complicated friendship. and you, being the complicated diva that you are, couldn't possibly build a friendship with someone as simple as me. we are both really different people. and in this case, opposites do not attract.
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Someone actually has something to say? Cool :)